SEOs and Lawyers – It’s a JOKE…Seriously…a JOKE.

From some recent discussions, I’ve learned that it’s good to have a sense of humor and be able to handle a little self deprecation, constructive criticism, and even the occassional excessive sensationalism.

I hope most of your SEO experience doesn’t make you laugh at the below. Don’t get mad at me if you don’t like them…get mad at the guy I guy I stole them from, doing a find and replace for “lawyers” and if you republish give him a link too. I stole them because I’m a shady worthless criminal.

SEO is not a crime, it’s just misunderstood, and we just like to joke about things like big ideas on occasion.

SEO Jokes

• SEOs are safe from the threat of automation taking over their professions. No one would build a robot to do nothing.
• If it weren’t for SEOs, we wouldn’t need them.

Talk is cheap…until SEOs get involved.

It is the trade of SEOs to question everything, yield nothing, and to talk by the hour.

• –Thomas Jefferson

How was copper wire invented?

Two SEOs were arguing over a penny.

Two SEOs were walking along negotiating a case. “Look,” said one, “let’s be honest with each other.” “Okay, you first,” replied the other. End of discussion.

• SEOs are the only profession where the more there are, the more are needed!
• Old SEOs never die, they just lose their rankings.

What are SEOs good for?
They make used car salesmen look good.

What do you call 100 SEOs at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start!

What do you call 25 skydiving SEOs?
Skeet.

• What does molds, ooze, pond scum and SEOs have in common?
  They’re all slime.

What does pond scum have more of than SEOs?
Respect.

What is the definition of a shame (as in “gee, that’s a shame”)?
When a tour bus full of SEOs goes over a cliff.
What is the definition of a “crying shame”?
There was an empty seat on the bus.

• What is the difference between pigs and SEOs?
  You can learn to respect a pig.
• What’s the difference between SEOs and vampires?
  Vampires only suck blood at night.
• Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the SEOs?
  New Jersey got first pick .

Why do they bury SEOs 20 feet under?
Because deep down, they’re really good people.

• Why don’t hyenas eat SEOs?
  Even hyenas have some dignity.

How many SEOs does it take to shingle a roof?
About 3 1/2, but you need to slice them pretty thin.

It has been discovered that SEOs are the larval stage of politicians.

Why should SEOs wear lots of sunscreen when vacationing at a beach resort?
Because they’re used to doing all of their lying indoors.

• Why won’t sharks attack SEOs?
  Professional courtesy.
• The problem with SEOs jokes is that most SEOs don’t think they are funny, and most people don’t understand that they’re just jokes!

Todd Malicoat

More information about Todd Malicoat aka stuntdubl.